Airliners.net

On board today SFO-LAX. A guy in the row in front of me is carrying on a loud conversation. (I say a "guy" rather than "guys" because one of the two is much louder and more obnoxcious).

Every other word out of his mouth is a swear. And he is often rather offensive toward other people. Not racist or homophobic. But borderline nasty.

What is your threshold before you say something? Do you intervene yourself or enlist an FA?

I'm usually a pretty non confrontational person and I don't like conflict but when someone starts making unprovoked derogatory remarks or threats towards myself or others I usually say something because that should not be tolerated. It's a tricky situation though because saying something to an individual who is misbehaving often pisses them off even more. I will never get physically violent with someone though unless they hit me first and I feel that I am in danger if I do not defend myself.

If it was bothering me, I'd look around first to see if anyone else was visibly bothered, or perhaps ask the person sitting next to me. If they were in agreement, I'd probably discreetly talk to an FA and let them handle it if they deem suitable.

If he's not a direct threat to me, who cares. It's not my job to correct someone else's behavior.

If it offended me - and it probably would - then yes, I would say something, and ask him to please with modify his language or else speak more quietly as his loud conversation is causing offence to the other passengers. It is important to do so in a non-confrontational way thoough; present it as a reasonable request, do not turn it into a challenge to him, as if he perceives you are challenging him he'll react badly. But if you ask him politely and give him a reason why he should stop his behaviour he'll be more likely to yield to your request.

Can offer a first hand experience,from 25 yrs ago on a CO 727 flight going down to Florida. In domestic First I was in A1 and the rude guy was in opposite window seat.He was loud and cussing from walking onboard, missed an earlier flight and was the airlines fault. He kept this up for at least 20 minutes after takeoff. Serveral people asked the FA to intervine which she did, but to no avail. The guy immeadiately behind him shouted "shut up - PLEASE" but he continued. That guy then stood up and slapped the rude guy hard on the side of the face so he hit the window. there was silence, and there continued to be silence for the next 3hrs.
Don't say it's right it's what happened.

777PHX wrote:

If he's not a direct threat to me, who cares. It's not my job to correct someone else's behavior.

Agreed.

I really don't get the big deal if someone is swearing, using offensive language, etc. It's not pleasant, but frankly nor are loads of other things I see on a daily basis - it doesn't mean I'm going to go on a crusade to try and stop it. Plus you never know how somebody else is going to react. You may get way, way more than you bargained for.

The smart option is to leave well alone.

My solution is always bringing headphones and listening to music. If I can still hear the person through the music then I just bottle up my rage or seriously consider asking the FA if they can intervene.

Headphones on, music up, ignore him. If he is disturbing the people around me still, they can handle it. I have a pretty thick skin, I don't feel the need to correct someone. Let the idiots reveal themselves.

af773atmsp wrote:

My solution is always bringing headphones and listening to music. If I can still hear the person through the music then I just bottle up my rage or seriously consider asking the FA if they can intervene.

jetblueguy22 wrote:

Headphones on, music up, ignore him. If he is disturbing the people around me still, they can handle it. I have a pretty thick skin, I don't feel the need to correct someone. Let the idiots reveal themselves.

Yes, I am with these and would do the same. It is the row in front, they are not in the same row, which is not quite as bad. After you get off the flight you will never see them again anyway. It is the FA job to make sure pax are not overly disrupted by one or two unruly persons. I would say something to the FA if I was to intervene at all.

I have no issue with people talking on their cell phone in a restaurant, airplane, subway, wherever. The problem though is many people often talk louder on their cell phone than they would if they were having a conversation with that person right next to them. The places where it really bothers me is somewhere like a pool or any relaxing environment.