I am autistic and just curious as to how people perceive it!

Good for you to ask this question, it takes some courage, so kuddos for you.

I have a father whom I think is towards the autistic spectrum, never tested though. So, if that is true, I find it quite hard to have someone in my direct surroundings, whom I was depended on, whom I loved literally as a father, whom supposed to help me in my life. As a son it was difficult. Now, as an adult, I accept his limitations thus also accept that I will not have a good relationship with him, no relationship of anything meaning to me. My nature is to have meaningful relationships and connect to others. So from my perspective, I find it kind of hard to deal with. Although some friends have tested in the autistic spectrum, but I know how to deal with it and what to expect and that's ok.

Having worked in retail, I just let people do their thing. I have just treated everyone the same. If someone with autism has extra needs and has a care giver, I let the care giver help when they need to. Otherwise, they are just another person. Maybe I go too far.

We have two autistic boys in our family. One is pretty much verbal, the other took quite some time to start communicating. Both are in suitable adult education now as they are in their 20s.

They aren't my kids so I didn't have the 24/7 issues, but just watching them over the years has reinforced my belief that they are perfectly normal. Just their own brand of normal. If you make the effort to fit into their world (I have staccao conversations with the non-verbal one of no more than four words in a sentence) it's been so rewarding just chatting with him now.

Sio my opinion? We are guests in their world and it is so rewarding when you cross that bridge and develop friendships with an autistic kid.

caliboy93 wrote:

I am autistic and just curious as to how people perceive it!

I am autistic also (I have Asperger's Syndrome) and it has been difficult for me to relate to many people. I was diagnosed at age 14 and for most of my early life, I had no clue what body language meant (my dad once asked me what it meant when someone rolled their eyes at me while I was speaking to them) and I had no idea. It's only been in the last 10 to 15 years that I've greatly improved my conversational skills.

Having Asperger's Syndrome does have some benefits, though. Throughout school I was known as a very intelligent person (who could name the capitals of virtually any country on earth and, to the surprise of my 7th grade teacher, knew where the Canary Islands were). I excelled in many of my subjects and my parents refused to let the schools put me in "special needs" class. I graduated high school with a 3.75 GPA.

University was a different story. I had virtually cruised through high school without needing to study, as people with Asperger's tend to focus on knowledge and repetition of facts, rather than application and thinking why things are (which is where universities focus). This, combined with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder as well as being zealously religious) and also laziness resulting in me barely getting my bachelor's degree in business administration with a GPA of around 2.8.

I didn't relate to people well and tried to have things "my way." I was hyper religious (a charismatic on a Southern Baptist campus) and tried to convert everyone to my way of thinking. Toward the end of my university career, I attempted suicide (swallowed 60 pills of Depakote and spent 5 days in the ICU and psych ward. I finished my degree, but pretty much lost most of my friends.

In the 10 years since I graduated from university, I've been working at a self-storage company that my parents and I started. We now have 7 locations across 1,300 storage units and are still growing.

Asperger's has its challenges, such as "special interests" where I can focus on something way beyond the attention span of a non-autistic person, to the point of ad nauseam, which turns off other people. My special interests have included bus schedules, airlines, languages, China and most recently, healthy living.

Since I've been on a diet and have been exercising the past few months, I've greatly improved. In the past, my doctor has considered putting me on disability (in which I'd receive $1,100 per month) and in a mental facility, however I absolutely refuse to give up my life and my career. I live independently from my parents, I have my own car and I buy my own groceries and fuel. My life is challenging yet it is rewarding at the same time.

Most Asperger's people are introverted and like to be alone, but I am extremely extroverted and love being around people. Asperger's Syndrome and autism in general are handicaps, yet they can be managed and even exploited if done properly. It doesn't mean that you can't live a more normal life; my life is an example of that. I hope this helps!

I'm probably not the best perspective, but I have Aspergers and have been ashamed of it even though I try not to be. When I was a kid my parents tried to get me into groups with other autistic people, but that only made me feel more ashamed. However I live a mostly normal life; the only aspects of Aspergers I have are being introverted, having specific (or very specific) interests, and not being good at reading body language and social cues. It's been difficult making friends, but I do have a close circle of friends. I've lived independently from my parents before and I look forward to having my own place, and the only difficult "adulting" activity for me is making phone calls.

Iloveboeing wrote:

caliboy93 wrote:

I am autistic and just curious as to how people perceive it!

I am autistic also (I have Asperger's Syndrome) and it has been difficult for me to relate to many people. I was diagnosed at age 14 and for most of my early life, I had no clue what body language meant (my dad once asked me what it meant when someone rolled their eyes at me while I was speaking to them) and I had no idea. It's only been in the last 10 to 15 years that I've greatly improved my conversational skills.

Having Asperger's Syndrome does have some benefits, though. Throughout school I was known as a very intelligent person (who could name the capitals of virtually any country on earth and, to the surprise of my 7th grade teacher, knew where the Canary Islands were). I excelled in many of my subjects and my parents refused to let the schools put me in "special needs" class. I graduated high school with a 3.75 GPA.

University was a different story. I had virtually cruised through high school without needing to study, as people with Asperger's tend to focus on knowledge and repetition of facts, rather than application and thinking why things are (which is where universities focus). This, combined with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder as well as being zealously religious) and also laziness resulting in me barely getting my bachelor's degree in business administration with a GPA of around 2.8.

I didn't relate to people well and tried to have things "my way." I was hyper religious (a charismatic on a Southern Baptist campus) and tried to convert everyone to my way of thinking. Toward the end of my university career, I attempted suicide (swallowed 60 pills of Depakote and spent 5 days in the ICU and psych ward. I finished my degree, but pretty much lost most of my friends.

In the 10 years since I graduated from university, I've been working at a self-storage company that my parents and I started. We now have 7 locations across 1,300 storage units and are still growing.

Asperger's has its challenges, such as "special interests" where I can focus on something way beyond the attention span of a non-autistic person, to the point of ad nauseam, which turns off other people. My special interests have included bus schedules, airlines, languages, China and most recently, healthy living.

Since I've been on a diet and have been exercising the past few months, I've greatly improved. In the past, my doctor has considered putting me on disability (in which I'd receive $1,100 per month) and in a mental facility, however I absolutely refuse to give up my life and my career. I live independently from my parents, I have my own car and I buy my own groceries and fuel. My life is challenging yet it is rewarding at the same time.

Most Asperger's people are introverted and like to be alone, but I am extremely extroverted and love being around people. Asperger's Syndrome and autism in general are handicaps, yet they can be managed and even exploited if done properly. It doesn't mean that you can't live a more normal life; my life is an example of that. I hope this helps!

Good for you, thanks for sharing, I think it is an inspiring story, don't give up.

caliboy93 wrote:

I am autistic and just curious as to how people perceive it!

I have learned something today, I thank you for your story. I wish you more success.

Interesting, I really haven't known or conversed with people with Asperger's, what I'm trying to understand is not being able to understand body language.

I assume it doesn't come naturally? Are you able to learn it through other mewns? Maybe you don't naturally know what something means but can you learn that a certain tone of voice or gesture means X?

Also, does knowing that you have Asperger's and what goes along with it help you avoid situations or make sense of ones that normally don't make any sense?

Sorry, I don't want to put anyone under a microscope and treat them like an experiment, but since I haven't talked with many people with Asperger's, I hope to get a better understanding if anyone is open to share

I've been one of the blunter people about this: like everyone else, people with autism/aspergers can be really great people (Who just struggle to connect with others naturally) or terrible people. I do think these extremes are far more pronounced in people on this spectrum. On one end you have Bill Gates who did pretty well for himself and society. On the other end, you have the Sandy hook shooter. Just depends where the individual focuses their energy, and the key difference between the above mentioned individuals is where they focused their energy and talents.

How does one get identified as having Asperger's?

You see I've been reading a lot about it after a friend shared that her son was diagnosed with Asperger's, and I find that I suffer from a lot of the same things that people with Asperger's do. I've an intense focus on only a few things - like aviation & Formula One racing, I can't read body language to save my life, I find it hard to relate to people and to socialize, which is doing wonders to my love life, and my career's in a mess as I just can't seem to really get into working with other people.

Am I talking sense or am I just talking nonsense here?

TheFlyingDisk wrote:

How does one get identified as having Asperger's?

You see I've been reading a lot about it after a friend shared that her son was diagnosed with Asperger's, and I find that I suffer from a lot of the same things that people with Asperger's do. I've an intense focus on only a few things - like aviation & Formula One racing, I can't read body language to save my life, I find it hard to relate to people and to socialize, which is doing wonders to my love life, and my career's in a mess as I just can't seem to really get into working with other people.

Am I talking sense or am I just talking nonsense here?

I won't speak to the aspects of being diagnosed, etc, but I will note that in general, people with autism, and more specifically Asperger's, tend to gravitate towards specific topics and hone in on them. As you call it, an intense focus. If you want to imagine: it's a sort of slider. The more you allow your focus to be driven, and gravitate to specifics, the more obsessed one becomes about such a topic, the more prevalent Asperger's will be found to impact your social abilities. (Perhaps "allow your focus" is not the correct phrase, mind you, as it's not something easily controlled for some. One might consider it in the same manner as an addiction, though I think that too is a poor way to frame it.)

It should come as no surprise that many of you here that have spoken about your own diagnosis of Asperger's also have an increased interest in all things aviation related. This can be a great thing in moderation. I've seen some incredible analysis by people on these forums. I'm sure at least a few of those posts, if not more, came from someone with a form of Asperger's. What is important is being able to recognize what your interests are, and gravitating towards other people who also have similar interests. This will have a huge impact in improving social life. An easy first step is coming to a forum like this. The next step is reaching out to aviation related clubs. There are places all over the world that restore aircraft, race RC airplanes, spotting groups, etc.

A note about the sandy hook shooter and his Asperger's, and why I believe what I mentioned above is also relevant in his case. I believe he took his interests in a certain area (firearms) to the extreme. Had someone been able to identify what his intense focus was on, and why, perhaps the end result would have been different. Its one reason we have to be careful when talking about guns and Asperger's. Every diagnosis of Asperger's is different, and most have no interest in firearms.

I'm glad to see folks reaching out. A very positive thing.

my nephew has highly functioning autism, he has always struggled with talking to others, so his classmates tend to discount him. He recently graduated from high school as class valedictorian. However, for whatever reason they didn't let him speak. His parents were upset, because they thought this would be a perfect time for his fellow class mates to see how smart he really is. Btw, his mother is a principle at local elementary school and my brother was the scientist teacher and coach at his son high school and still they wouldn't let him speak. I think, one has to find a place for themselves and be content with what they can offer others and accept their limitations. I had a worker who has low functioning autism, her father is a friend of mine and i wanted to help her, but i had no idea what i was getting into, she really struggles to do simple task. She needs a lot of guidance and assistance. I been told by professionals to let her go, that i am not doing her any favors by her doing a job that she clearly cannot do and it's hurting her self-worth i am hurting her, not helping her. So, i did listen and let her go. Hopefully, she will find a job doing something else. I feel terrible about having to do this. However, in the long run it's for the best according to the professionals.

DLFREEBIRD wrote:

my nephew has highly functioning autism, he has always struggled with talking to others, so his classmates tend to discount him. He recently graduated from high school as class valedictorian. However, for whatever reason they didn't let him speak. His parents were upset, because they thought this would be a perfect time for his fellow class mates to see how smart he really is.

As a high functioning asperger myself, I am pretty sure your nephew will be more than happy to not have to do the speech. Being in a crowd is not normally something an asperger likes, being in front of a crowd is even worse.

petertenthije wrote:

DLFREEBIRD wrote:

my nephew has highly functioning autism, he has always struggled with talking to others, so his classmates tend to discount him. He recently graduated from high school as class valedictorian. However, for whatever reason they didn't let him speak. His parents were upset, because they thought this would be a perfect time for his fellow class mates to see how smart he really is.

As a high functioning asperger myself, I am pretty sure your nephew will be more than happy to not have to do the speech. Being in a crowd is not normally something an asperger likes, being in front of a crowd is even worse.

I must be unique as someone with Asperger's being an extreme extrovert. I love being around people and striking up conversations. As I was in my adolescent and teenage years, I tended to gravitate towards talking with adults and not as much with people my own age. Even though most Asperger's people are introverts, I am extroverted and get quite upset when I am alone. Of course, there's also the fact that I've been through many relationships and could not relate well to my partners. With our business, I love to chat with customers.

I am 32 years old and have learned a lot in the past decade. I have also accomplished a lot, despite having both Asperger's and bipolar. I'd love to see people like me given more opportunities in education and the workforce. There's way too many people on disability today; people should be given the opportunity to make something of themselves, so they can contribute to society.

caliboy93 wrote:

I am autistic and just curious as to how people perceive it!

You're a human being just like the rest of us. The only thing about autistic person that might be a problem is that I don't know who is autistic and who are not. When I know, I try to adjust so we are both comfortable. Let us know so we know and don't have to guess, or even worse make wrong assumption of you. So don't be ashamed but tell people when you can't "connect". Most people understand and those who don't... well, they are not worth your time.

Iloveboeing wrote:

petertenthije wrote:

DLFREEBIRD wrote:

my nephew has highly functioning autism, he has always struggled with talking to others, so his classmates tend to discount him. He recently graduated from high school as class valedictorian. However, for whatever reason they didn't let him speak. His parents were upset, because they thought this would be a perfect time for his fellow class mates to see how smart he really is.

As a high functioning asperger myself, I am pretty sure your nephew will be more than happy to not have to do the speech. Being in a crowd is not normally something an asperger likes, being in front of a crowd is even worse.

I must be unique as someone with Asperger's being an extreme extrovert. I love being around people and striking up conversations. As I was in my adolescent and teenage years, I tended to gravitate towards talking with adults and not as much with people my own age. Even though most Asperger's people are introverts, I am extroverted and get quite upset when I am alone. Of course, there's also the fact that I've been through many relationships and could not relate well to my partners. With our business, I love to chat with customers.

I am 32 years old and have learned a lot in the past decade. I have also accomplished a lot, despite having both Asperger's and bipolar. I'd love to see people like me given more opportunities in education and the workforce. There's way too many people on disability today; people should be given the opportunity to make something of themselves, so they can contribute to society.

I don't know if you would be considered unique, the girl that worked for me, was also a extrovert a cheerful chatterbox, and a joy to be around. i guess she got her diagnosis because she had a hard time following instructions, and would become easily frustrated with others. She had a hard time being in a relationship, i think she told me that her longest relationship with the opposite sex lasted about a week. She wanted a relationship very badly, and probably tried too hard. If this is any help to you, just put yourself out there, and see what happens the more you do that the better you will become at navigating socially.